Coping skills are the
thoughts, emotions and behaviors that you use to adjust to changes that take
place in your life. Although I've taught the coping skills lesson for years, this week I shared some new information that I know will make a difference. I looked at two kinds of coping.
Problem-focused coping and Emotion-focused coping.
Problem-focused coping:
Directed towards reducing or eliminating a stressor. Adapting a behavior.
Emotion-focused coping:
Directed towards changing ones own emotional reaction or response.
Let's look at problem-focused coping...
With Problem-focused coping
we use problem focused strategies to deal with the cause of our problem. We do
this by finding out more information on the problem and we learn new skills to
manage the problem.
Problem-focused coping is
aimed at changing or eliminating the source of the stress.
There are three problem-focused strategies
that are important to use. Taking control (when it’s in your control) seeking
information, and then evaluating the pros and cons.
How many of the huge stressors
of our life do we really have control over and sit idly feeling out of
control, stuff our feelings and stay exactly where we are???
I couldn't help but think about Joshua Chamberlain, Gettsburg 1863 who when faced with a decision to do nothing or do something, gave the command to "CHARGE!" That one decision changed the course of history even up to this present day!
How many times do we allow the stress of our
current circumstance to drive us to eating, drinking, shopping, when we really
do have control over it! We can “DO something” and change things. We can use problem-focused coping to change things and be healthy and whole.
What areas of your life right now do you need to do something???
Is it as simple as clean your house? Or as
difficult as change jobs? Are you going to allow something out there to tell
you you can’t change??? Or are you going to “do something??”
Problem-focused coping...that might be the easy one. :-)
What about emotion-focused coping?
It involves releasing pent-up emotions, managing hostile feelings, meditating or using relaxation techniques. Emotion–focused coping is a skill to alleviate stress by minimizing, reducing, or preventing the emotional components of the stressor. The focus of this coping skill is to change the meaning of the stressor or transfer attention away from it.
Change the meaning of the stressor...just what does that look like? I encouraged everyone to take a journey that I've recently been on. Identifying painful events from my past but then finding the redemptive perceptive in each one of those things. What did that pain do for you? Who are you today because of that hard life event? Finding redemption from a painful time changes the meaning of the stressor. When you can do that, the event ceases to be so painful.
We also took a look at transferring attention away from the stressor. This is where you have to be careful…it doesn’t
mean drown your sorrows, or stuff your feelings. It means laugh, spend time
with loved ones, go to the beach and look at the waves, listen to music and get
lost in it, worship… transfer the attention away from the death of a loved one,
a serious illness, a sorrowful situation. Sometimes we need to set aside those
things that are out of our control and breathe in goodness.
Transferring attention away from a problem…that
can be a positive thing for a short period of time, however it can be
detrimental to you and your health over an extended period. It’s still so
crucial to process the chunks in our cup right??? It's important to deal with the stuff, the
things that have caused our stress so that we keep living a forward focused life instead of spending our
lives looking backwards.
Coping…it’s HUGE! Not only in
weight loss, but in life. When we cope…we will be whole, happy, free, at peace, content…anybody
want any of that???
When we avoid, numb and stuff our feelings…we end up
broken unhappy, incarcerated, in turmoil, discontent…anybody?
As always...it was a powerful day at The Healthy Weigh. Our after classes were too. Lots of great discussion about coping skills!
Our winners for the week:
Noon: Team "Material Girls" Yo Yo and Sandi with a 1.63% of weight loss!
6 PM: Team "Butt Weight" Joanie and Greg with a 2.19% for the week!
Our HEART award for the top individual went to Madison S. with a 3.03% of weight loss! Wow Madison...great job!
Your Challenge for the week:
Download and listen to week # 6 Body~ Soul ~ Spirit, the Spiritual Perspective and do the homework provided.
Use Problem-focused coping and Emotion-focused coping this week!
We're coming into week 9 of this Winter Team Challenge! We've learned a lot, grown a lot and had a lot of fun! I'm looking forward to seeing how it all ends up! Keep up the fight everybody!!
Always encouraging you,
Letha
